The bearded lady at Burger King
This was last year I believe. My brother’s buddy came by to pick him up one night, and off they went. No big. 15 minutes later, I get an insane frantic phone call from my brother…
“Holy shit, RJ and I just went to go to [a local fast food restaurant name brand chain] right, and like, we get there and you know the guy answers the speaker and he is like [in a burly voice] ‘can I help you bla bla bla….’. So like, we order and shit, and pull to the window, but its a, I think a lady. But like, when she talks its like the same deep ass voice! And like, she had a goatee and the the whole deal man…”
And he proceeded to tell me how shocked they were and we laughed at length about the situation.
Burger King is notorious for bearded women. At least thats the word on the streets.
So, the chemicals-that-be in my brain got cookin’, and I instantly had two distinct thoughts. One. You are now hungry, and [previously mentioned fast food chain] sounds damn good right about now. Two. I actually felt jealous and sad that I wasn’t able to experience this same experience. If only I could recreate this. So off I go. Now you have to understand that along the way was like 20 minutes of road construction, and like 3 different tards cutting me off and whatnot. So by the time I get to fast food destination, I was just glad to be there. And when you have A.D.D. as bad as me, well, you just forgot all about the burly voice thing.
So now I’m in the drive thru. Homeboy takes my order and what not and off I roll up to the window. Ho. Lee. Shit. It’s the dude. And she’s got a goatee. And his arms are harrier than me. And then it hit me like a shit ton of bricks.
I actually was given the chance to relive, the very two things, that only moments (well, moments+20 minutes) ago, I had dreamed about.
Whew, man. I just got goose bumps.
